It’s Not Easy Being Little: By Crackers

Hey everyone! It’s Crackers again and I’m taking over the blog whether Mom likes it or not because I DO WHAT I WANT! Just because I’m little doesn’t mean you can fuck with me.

That’s exactly what I want to talk about today. I’m the littlest one at my house, and it sucks. When Miles wants to steal food, he can just jump up on the counter when the humans aren’t looking because he’s so much bigger than me. If I want some of the humans’ food, I have to beg, act super cute and be kinda pathetic. That’s not who I am of course, but I’ll do anything for food. I mean, I’m just a cute starving puppy so please feed me?

The next worst thing about being little is that Miles tries to kick my ass A LOT. He’s bigger and stronger, but I know the right angles to get him back. He tries to block me from the door when it’s walk time, but the humans take me for walks anyway.

The worst thing about being so little is that if Mom wants me to go in my room and I disagree, she can just pick me up. Talk about embarrassing! Miles is lucky she can’t pick him up because he’s too big. I wonder what he ate to get so big, and if I could get my paws on the magic growth formula.

It looks sunny outside, so I think I’ll take a nap and dream about cheese. Let me know if you have any information about the magic growth formula.

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